The Body Is Not an Apology

All our body rules are made up!

Being different is difficult in a world that tells us there is a “normal.” Many of us have oriented our entire lives around an effort to be “normal,” never realizing that “normal” is not a stationary goal.

Often our translations of people’s ideas are not accurate depictions of what they were sharing. Be sure to engage with people based on their actual words and not what you assume those words meant. If you are unsure, ask for clarity.

Have compassion for and honor people’s varied journeys. Not everyone has read the books you’ve read or had the experiences you’ve had. There was a time when you had not had them either. Our journeys are unique and varied. Compassion births patience.

Avoid having conversations from the assumption of right and wrong. Even if every cell in your body disagrees with someone’s perspective, remember that making people “bad” and “wrong” will never build connection and understanding. People who feel judged and attacked often only become further entrenched in their ideas

Phrases like “Get over it!” and “It’s all in your head” are rooted in ableism. They are body terrorism against non-normative brains. Let’s stop telling people to “get over it” and start asking, “How can I help you heal?”

Making peace with your body is your mighty act of revolution

Humans are rarely given permission to not understand without someone calling us failures or stupid

When we are honest with ourselves, we feel gross about the way we vulture other humans, picking apart their bodies, consuming them for the sake of our own fragile sense of self. We feel gross when we think about all the vicious, cruel comments we’ve heard leveled against people’s bodies, comments spoken around us without a single protest from us

Not only have we been trying to change our “wrong bodies” but we have also continued to apologize for the presumed discomfort our bodies rouse in others.