Why didn't somebody tell me this sooner

What I wish somebody had told me back then is if you’re stuck in your head you’re missing your life. Your life doesn’t happen in your head, it happens in every current moment as you interact with the world and the people around you. The more you analyze, daydream, replay past interactions, anticipate what will happen in the future, and so on, the less present you are for your life. You only get one short life anyway—don’t you want to really be there to experience as much of it as you can?

No one was born knowing how to manage their finances or to fix their plumbing—they were either taught by someone who did or they hire someone who does know or they scour the internet to learn from experts. Just getting over yourself and your pride and asking for help can save you a ton of work, mistakes, headaches, and time.

There’s actually research on this that found that athletes who finished in second place at the Olympic Games (who are mentally comparing themselves to the athletes who finished first and thinking things like, “Ugh, I was so close to winning gold!”) are actually less happy than the athletes who finished in third place (who are comparing themselves to the athletes who didn’t make it onto the medal podium at all). You’d think that silver medal winners wo

I wish somebody had told me back then (because I’m sure I could’ve used this knowledge in other situations) is that you have to take risks to make progress, to grow as a person, and to make your life better. You cannot play it safe and stay in your comfort zone all your life and expect anything to change or improve. Try new things. Consider new opportunities, even if they seem impossible at first. Don’t say no to something just because it’s big and scary. Your future and your future happiness depend on it.

What I wish somebody had told me back then is you can get over the motivational hump by using this strategy: imagine having a conversation with yourself, just not your current self. Picture yourself at some point in the future when not doing the thing you’re struggling to start doing now will come back to bite you in the butt.

don’t have to love who anyone tells you to love. Heck, you don’t have to end up in a committed, long-term relationship with another person at all. You don’t have to stay in your hometown. You don’t have to study what your parents want you to or go into the same line of work as one or both of your parents. You don’t have to play by their rules.

there is no script for your life.

, I adopted that roadmap for myself too.

You can sit on the sidelines and watch other people live their lives or you can choose to show up and be the writer, director, and star for your own.

The only lives your parents get to lay claim to are their own.