The power of getting to that understanding, and not to some simple “yes,” is revelatory in the art of negotiation. The moment you’ve convinced someone that you truly understand her dreams and feelings (the whole world that she inhabits), mental and behavioral change becomes possible, and the foundation for a breakthrough has been laid
Don’t try to get “yes” from your counterpart, but try to understand what he truly wants and feels, and then use this information to get what you want