Amy Liptrot

Through the windows of my flat in Kreuzberg, there is just a parallelogram of sky at the top of the courtyard, only a small space to catch the passing moon on certain clear nights.
B said that people move here just so they can tell their friends back home that they’re living in Berlin. B said that people moving here often feel like they’ve dropped several years, that they can extend their youth.

I tried to be okay, to relax and be grateful for what I had, but I kept being jolted by a lurching for more. The same desire and self-belief that motivated me made me frustrated. The pain was a by-product of my ambition.

There were days when the loneliness built up and came spilling out in angry comments – often directed at the island. On nights when I was aching and alone, I wondered if this was the life I’d stopped drinking to live.